‘Learnings’ Articles at Everyday People, Page 2

Buffaloes, Planes and Wiffle Ball !!

This past week I was completely unplugged as I was at Summer Camp at the Pioneer Scout Reservation with the Boy Scouts. To say it was spectacular would not capture the experience enough !! I know that the idea of camping for a week in 100+ degree weather for a few days followed by 14 straight hours of monsoonlike rain isn’t for everyone, but I wouldn’t trade it in for the world !!

There were so many memories forged, but let me highlight just a few . . .

I slept through a heat lightning thunderstorm in an open field approximately 100 yards from a herd of buffalo at the Wild Winds Buffalo Preserve.
My son flew an airplane including lift off . . . and he’s 14 !!
Our Troop built a wiffle ball field inside our campsite. They made the bases from log pieces cut by them with a two-man saw.
The kids challenged the camp staff to a wiffle ball game on our field and beat them 16 – 6. I was deemed a “traitor” because I put on a staff shirt and hat and played for their team !!

The list could go on and on. The amazing thing is that even when I’m away from the “normal” world of work – HR still happens. Our leaders and scouts went out of our way to bond with the Staff and encourage them in all the great work that they do. Everyday staff members were in our site to socialize, play Euchre (an essential of scouting life !!) and even ask for advice. They are talented young men and women who choose to take their summers to help boys advance in their scouting career.

The best lesson I learned from camp this year was that, because I was disconnected from the outside/electronic/social media world, I could focus. I could focus on what mattered the most . . . the people around me.

Whether it was calming a young kid down from a serious bought of home sickness, or seeing my son become a young man and lead others, you didn’t have the chance to focus on anything else. You could take in every challenge, obstacle and opportunity and encourage, coach and guide people to be successful in what they were pursuing.

We hosted the leaders from the summer camp’s other Troops at our site and I taught them how to share one great thing about their kids and they stayed at our site for 2 1/2 hours sharing amazing things !!

This break from the wild pace of life reminded me that I want to continue to be an HR professional who focused on people first. You know that when we focused on the boys they completed their work, laughed for hours and hours, and worked together to do things that they’d never try on their own.

I think we make HR too hard. I am taking the lessons from this past week and implementing them even more. So, each night I’m going outside to gaze into the night sky and breathe deep to keep me grounded. Of course I’ll be wearing tie-dye, and you can see that this legacy will continue with at least a handful of young men for years to come.

I call him “Dad” !!

Other than being married, the greatest joy I have in life is the gift of being a father !! You’ve seen me write about both of my kids, Melanie (18 and soon heading off to college) and Josh (14 and planning to take over the world). I’ve even written about my biological father who was a decorated veteran of the Vietnam War. Today, however, I’m writing about my dad.

You see, I hail from the Center of the Universe which is also known as the Village of Ada, Ohio. This is where my brother and I grew up during our formative Jr. High and Sr. High years and where my parents still reside. This story starts about one year before we moved to this incredible mecca !!

My mother is in the 1st wing of the “Mothers Hall of Fame” !! That is not an exaggeration. ANYONE who has met my mom would say this within minutes of meeting her. Since I was the “man of the house” since the age of four, I was very protective of my mom and didn’t quite get why she had to meet someone else. Thankfully, I wasn’t really in charge and the good Lord brought Don into my mom’s life. He seemed cool enough, but I didn’t want him getting “too close” to my mom.

One night after they had been “courting” (that’s what they called it – not me), he came to the room where my brother and I stayed and we had the following conversation:

Don – “Boys, I wanted to talk to you and ask you something.”

Steve – “Sure. What do you want to tell us?” (I didn’t allow my younger brother to speak because I was – and still am – the firstborn)

Don – “Well, your mom and I have decided to get married.”

(My brother and I were stunned and shocked. How could she do this? We didn’t need him !! He went on . . .)

Don – “Well, boys, I just wanted to ask. When we’re married, do you want to call me ‘Dad’ or ‘Don’ ??”

(Get ready for it. Here comes the most calloused response in the history of families !!)

Steve – “We’ll call you ‘Don’ because you will NEVER be our father !!”

(Did I mention that I was an idiot 13 year old punk?)

Don – “That’s fine boys. Good night.”

He didn’t put up a fight and was incredibly gracious (as he always has been.) Later that summer in 1976 during the glitz of the Bicentennial, my brother and I stood in polyester suited glory at my mom and Don’s wedding. We moved to Ada and the rest is history – well, sort of . . .

Don raised my brother Mark and I as if we were his own sons. He was always fair, structured and showed us amazing things. He taught us about work ethic, manners, treating women with respect and most of all . . . love mixed with incredible humor !!

The day of my high school graduation, he grabbed me and hugged me and told me he loved me. He followed that with, “So, when are you moving out?” Through laughter and tears I embraced him and said, “I love you Dad !!”

He always had been my “Dad” and now I realized it. He has been nothing but amazing my whole life with him. He showed me, and continues to show me, the mantra I live by:

Model the behavior you expect in others.

He’s now a grandfather five times over and he comes to most of the grandkids events. He never missed one event my brother and I were involved in – EVER !!

This week he made sure to let me know that he was retiring at the young age of 70. I adore my father !! If I can be half the man he has been for me, then I know that I will have left a grand legacy.

Happy Father’s Day to anyone fortunate enough to be a Father. Never take it lightly for you are leaving a legacy to each and everyone you touch !!

So Much Room to Move !!

Rain for hours. Mud everywhere. Solemn flag retirement. Scavenger hunt. Tons of Euchre games. Food that is flat amazing. Big word Saturday (you got credit if you used big words during your conversations). Flames shooting from a lantern, and everyone points and says, “Mr. Browne – look !! Cool !!”

As I type this week’s post, I’ll be honest, I’m exhausted. I just returned from a weekend of scouting with the great boys and adults of Troop 941. It’s our annual “advancement outing” where we get our new scouts started along their way, and the older scouts also work on things to advance in their ranks. It seems that every Advancement Outing is filled with challenging weather and unexpected surprises. This one was no different !!

One of the things I truly love about Scouting is that the focus is to let the boys learn, fail, learn again, teach and then move forward. The hope is that they get the spark to someday reach Eagle Scout.

It’s interesting because the Troop is a microcosm (big word) of the workplace. Every boy is different and has quirks that make them truly standout. As adult leaders, we do our best to guide them to making the decisions that will allow them to truly develop. We are constantly fighting the urge to jump in and fix it all because we learn that our greatest trial is . . . patience.

The beauty of the system is that the boys can do so many things in so many ways to reach their goals. This drives some adults (and boys) crazy because they feel that tight structure will lend a successful end for one and all. Some kids don’t even see the structure (which warms my heart !!)

In the workplace, we in HR use policies as our “structure” and we do our best to enforce, cajole and discipline everyone who falls outside of them. We think we’re doing our job, but not really. I think policies are broader than most. They should be parameters that allow people room to move and perform. They should never be vehicles for control than can never be fully reached and will most certainly not allow people to be consistent.

We need to be like the scouts who look at eminent danger and say, ” Oooh, cool !!” I learn something every time I get to go and lay under the stars and the rain and the mud. Amid all that, you only hear playing, laughter and memories being made. It’s a great “workplace.” Maybe we’d all enjoy what we did a bit better if we loosened the reigns and allowed people room to move !!

We’re Everywhere !!

I just returned from an incredible conference in San Antonio, Texas for the HR/TD group of the Credit Union National Association (CUNA). This was my second time with this group of HR professionals and I have to say that, as a whole, they are some of the most welcoming folks I’ve met in our field !!

I never take it lightly when I get the opportunity to speak in front of any group – especially peers in my field. I know the challenges they face in their organizations, how others outside of HR view the field and that working with people can be tough. However, I also know that they have the ability to be amazing in what they do and where they work !!

It was truly fascinating to be inside an HR group within an industry. Because, you see, most of us don’t even know these great HR pros exist !!

The majority of people in HR have a very narrow focus. You can read all you want about being “broad,” but most people have either a comfort zone or a personal capacity where they keep their HR community pretty close. Be honest, we tend to look for HR “voices” either in Social Media or through SHRM National, or local chapters. These are all great avenues to connect with HR people, but it’s not the only place we exist. The fact is . . . HR people are everywhere !!

Since that is the case and HR people are everywhere, what keeps us from connecting? Let me throw this out to you . . .

We’re surrounded by people every day, and we lose site that there would be an advantage to get to connect with other great HR pros. The “negative” voices rear their ugly head like – “They’ll probably want something from me.” “What if they’re creepy?” “I really don’t have time for more people in my already busy life.”

We’ve bought into the myth that our current relationships can provide all we need to be effective HR folks. In fact, some companies HR people NEVER leave the confines of their own organization because they’re gigantic and they feel they have all the resources they need internally.

Don’t buy it !! I can give you countless stories of great HR people I continue to meet, interact with, and connect to others. I’m glad this faction of the HR world asked me to venture to Texas. I told them that I was writing about them and hope to see more of them get connected in the greater HR universe.

My hope is you do this as well !! This week, step out. Meet one new HR connection. I guarantee it will only improve what you do and how you look at HR !!

I Don’t Get it !!

This past weekend I had the privilege of seeing my cousin’s daughter get married. My generation is getting older and now our kids are adults !! It’s cool to go through this though to see the continuation of life pass through the generations.

I don’t know if I mentioned this or not, but I grew up on a farm with my grandparents. My mom was a widow and had to work, so my brother and I grew up (and worked) on the farm as young kids. I mention this because the wedding this weekend was between two farming families. It is always great to be with my extended family and get reminded of the joy that farming offers.

You see, farmers have EVERYTHING pulling against them !! The weather could be too hot, too dry or too wet which all affects planting and harvest. Can they control the weather? No. Then there are pests, weeds, disease, etc. These affect and attack crops and livestock. You can limit some of the damage these things can do, but it’s never ending. A farmer’s day starts at sunrise, involves some form of hard labor throughout the day and you fall into bed late after sunset.

Every farmer I know loves what they do. They understand the challenges, and they can be monumental with the slightest shift in everything from the economy to equipment failing. They are some of the most wholesome people I know and I’m proud to have grown up in a family that still continues this tradition to provide for others.

As I am driving home, I think of all that I have. Phenomenal job, fantastic wife and great kids. A home, transportation, etc. As I listen as I enter back into the burbs, all I hear about is what people don’t have and how we’re missing the newest bauble of technology or convenience.

And I think to myself – I don’t get it !!

Don’t get me wrong, my farming relatives have many of the same things we’re fortunate to have, and I know they’d like to have new things as well. However, with all this plenty that surrounds me, my family and my friends/co-workers – why is there never enough?

I don’t have an answer to this. It just puzzles me because in HR we constantly deal with the “not enough” syndrome in the workplace. Oddly, the farmers get up every day to do amazing things and life moves forward. I think I’m going to get a model tractor to put on my desk to remind me of my roots . . .

How about you ??

Thanks Coach !!

This weekend my daughter’s basketball career came to an end. She is a senior in high school, and her team was beaten in their first tournament game. I knew that we’d have these “last” things during her senior year, but it was still very tough.

But, it was amazing as well. You see this year was different than most with basketball. My daughter is phenomenal. If you remember nothing else from this post, you need to remember that. Two days before tryouts, her coach asked to talk to her before practice started. The coach told my daughter she needed to make a choice. She told her how much she cared for her, and that there was a place for her on the team, but she would never play. This was devastating to say the least.

My daughter, like all kids, had worked for countless hours and years playing basketball. She’s always been a great role player and never the star. She knew that and so did the coach. The coach told her that she’d like to offer my daughter another option for her Senior year – to be an Assistant Coach. My daughter balked because she thought that was another word for “manager.” She was hurt and didn’t know what to do. The coach asked her to think about it overnight, talk to her parents about it as well as other girls on the team to get input.

That night I received a call from the coach asking me how my daughter was doing. I told her that she was hurt, confused, and there were a lot of tears. The coach asked me if my daughter told me about their conversation, and I said she had. She told me how much she cared for Mel and our family being involved with the program. I told the coach that I absolutely understood her position and that I appreciated her being up front with my daughter.

Then, the amazing part happened. I said, “Coach, you’re running a team and you need to put the best team out there. I deal with this every day in HR and I understand that you’re doing what you can to succeed and I support that.” The coach said, “That’s why we chose Mel to be an Asst. Coach because I knew you and Debbie would understand.” I told the coach, “Thanks (many tears). You see, my job is to raise an adult, not a basketball player.” The coach said, “You’re doing a great job because she’s a great kid !!”

So, my daughter was Coach Mel this year. She helped in many ways and was more included in things than she ever was as a player. A few weeks ago, my wife and I escorted her across the court during Senior Night along with all the Senior players. My daughter showed her strength as a team player and a leader as a coach. We couldn’t be more proud.

Mel’s coach did something that we in the HR and business world need to do more of: (1) Care for our employees, (2) Recognize their strengths, (3) Be candid about their role and how they can best contribute and (4) Allow them to do that and flourish !!

I really appreciate that Mel’s coach took the time to keep her indcluded and create this role for her this year. She has been, and will continue to be, an incredible part of our daughter’s life. She has left a permanent mark of a positive role model. She’s imprinted our family’s lives as well along with the other girls and families in the program.

So, even though the season ended this weekend, her actions will last forever !!

Are you full ??

This past weekend I had a real treat by spending it in Amish Country in Ohio. It gives a whole new perspective on life because this culture chooses to live life differently than the vast majority of us !!

This post isn’t a commentary on the Amish, but it is an observation. As I watched the buggies passing me by and sampling way too much amazing cheese, I noticed a sense of contentment that I don’t see in many people. These good folks lives are not only are based on their faith, but also on what they choose what to fill their lives with. The brash realities of a world that exists in a completely opposite realm faces them every day, and yet they continue to live their lives with pride.

As an HR practitioner, much of my day is surrounded by people – and I dig that !! One of the true challenges I run into is how to respond to people who consistently seem frustrated with almost all aspects of their work and the people they work with. The more I listen, and sometimes pry, I notice a pattern. Much of their frustration is based on the sense that they’re “too busy” and “no one understands.”

When I step back from these conversations I try to look and see what is making them “busy.” All of us are full. No one says they have extra time on their hands – quite the contrary. But, what are we filled with? Are the things that consume our daily lives productive, or not? It’s not hard to fill your day with “stuff,” or to focus on the areas you’re most comfortable. It’s human nature.

But, what if we sat down and made a list (paper or electronic) of what our day consists of? Would we like what we see? Do we like what we fill our lives at work with? Too often I hear people churn on what isn’t happening, or what’s not being done. There’s validity in that, but the approach isn’t constructive. Making strides forward with intent with what you have available (culture, resources, staff, etc.) is much healthier.

It reminds me of the good people I was with this weekend. Maybe we would all benefit if we were a little more “full” like the Amish. What do you think?

You can’t handle the truth !!

One of the toughest things in HR is that we are called upon to keep so many things confidential. It’s difficult because we can’t even tell others that may think we’re “lying” when we’re actually keeping the peace. When I was just starting my career in HR, I came face-to-face to the power of what confidentiality means.

I worked for a small entrepreneurial company and the owner felt that is was time to start his succession plan and name a new President and he would move into the role of CEO so he could focus on externally growing the Company. He was going to rely on the new President to run the internal day-to-day operations. He had an engineering background, so to him everything was pretty black and white. Not a lot of gray.

I hadn’t worked with him much, but now I was put into a position of working with this new executive every day. One of the first things, let’s call him Barry, did was dive into salaries. He hadn’t had access to what others made in the organization, but it was the first thing he asked for from HR. Imagine that !! I had a gut feeling that this wasn’t going to go well.

At his first management meeting, he thought he’d “set the stage” for his reign by saying, “I’d like to go off the agenda.”

We worked in an open office with no walls from the 1st to 3rd floor, so everyone who worked in the office could hear everything – literally. Barry states, “I’ve been reviewing the salaries and I think Steve makes too much as our HR Manager.”

You can guess what my face looked like. And, you can also guess that I was having “fond” feelings about this change !! Everyone was silent. No one knew how to react.

Just then, the CEO said, “Really? Steve, how much do you make?” (Remember EVERYONE can hear what we said at these meetings and you could hear crickets chirping waiting for my response.)

“Uh, do I have to say?” I said. The CEO said, “If you want to keep your job, tell everyone your salary.”

I gulped and said, ” I make $46,000 per year.” No reaction from the managers. You see I made the least. “So, how much does our Plant Manager make?” (he’s at the table too !!) “He makes $55,000 per year.” The plant manager, my best friend, gave me the look of death. The CEO went around the table and made me state every manager’s salary. When it came to the President, the CEO said, “And Barry? How much does he make now that I’ve promoted him?”

I couldn’t believe I had to do this. I looked down at the table and said, “Barry makes $110,000 per year.” I could feel the daggers coming at me from Barry. “Steve, what about me? What do I make?,” said the CEO. I felt as if I was going to throw up in front of everyone. You see, Barry didn’t know how much the CEO made. I said, “You make $185,000 per year.” Barry turned ashen. He wasn’t as close to the top as he thought.

The CEO said, “You see, that’s why Steve’s in HR and you’re not Barry. He can handle confidential information. Now either grow up, or step down. Salaries are just numbers and now that we have the air cleared, can we get back to the agenda?”

I respected the CEO even more and any credibility Barry thought he had by wielding power had evaporated.

What we do in HR is tough. Hang in there because we can handle the truth !!