‘Intentional’ Articles at Everyday People, Page 21

1st Time Handshake . . .

This past week I was fortunate to be the emcee for the second DisruptHR in Cincinnati !! We had another great time and the presentations were unique, diverse and thought provoking. The venue of Memorial Hall also added to the ambiance of the night. The true highlight for me was seeing many familiar faces as well as a large number of new people.

It’s fascinating to me to see how people greet each other at HR events. People look for people that they know first if they didn’t already come with someone they know. If they don’t know people, they head to either a corner or the bar to get a view of the room and scope out how they’re going to maneuver around people before figuring a way to get to their seat with the fewest interactions possible.

If someone does introduce themselves they tend to keep a clear distance and reach for a business card as a force field to get the niceties out of the way. There may be some small talk exchanged asking where someone works, why did they come to the event and what do they expect. More often than not, the room is filled with more people you don’t know than it is people you do know.

I’m not trying to make fun, it’s just what I see. I’m an extreme extrovert, and I know that isn’t common. I thrive in a room full of people. I can’t wait to meet as many people as I can. I don’t want to just meet them, I want to get to know them. In order to not have this be overwhelming, I’ve developed the following approach.

1st time handshake. 2nd time hug !!

Okay, the hugging part may be overwhelming, but it’s necessary. I mean it !! People need to be hugged especially if they work in HR. You’ve heard me say that working with people is challenging. That is nothing new, but a genuine support system for HR is !! HR people tend to want to move on their own and have bought into the myth that they shouldn’t be close to anyone.

Being isolated in our field is senseless and harmful. It’s harmful because if you think you can foster engagement in employees, but you aren’t connected to other people on purpose youself, then you’re just trying to make something come to life you don’t believe in. We need to care for each other and be up front about it.

I remember a few years ago, Joe Gerstandt came to speak at Ohio SHRM and I was the program chair. We had never met in person at that time, only through social media. When I saw him far across the room, I squealed and ran over to him and gave him a giant bear hug. (I skipped my 1st time rule.) Joe pulled back a bit from me and said, “I guess brothers hug.” Love that !!

Ironically, other HR people there chastized me for being loud and too excited. You see, we want order and decorum in a world that is calling for empathy and compassion. I choose hugs and will not shy away from it. I’ve had too many people melt in an embrace because it hit them just at the right time.

This week, Ohio SHRM is happening once again and I will be giving out hugs as much as possible !! To say I’m Geeked would be an understatement. I will love seeing friends and meeting new ones.

If I see you there (or at other great HR and SHRM events), choose. I’m good with a hug right off the bat. You need to know someone cares about you and that you are in HR. I’ll be looking for you !!

Repurposing HR !!

Recently, my family and I had a gigantic garage sale !! Seriously, my entire garage, family room and front porch were filled. We had all of the possessions of my mother-in-law who recently passed. There were tons of memories as we sorted everything, and it took over a week just to sort all of the “treasures.”

We prepped, priced and positioned everything so it had the best chance to be sold. Our goal was to sell it all with the proceeds going toward my son’s Eagle Scout project. It always amazes me that when you have one of these sales your street is lined with people who just can’t wait to see what you’re offering. We were scheduled to open at 9:00am and the first folks started showing up at 7:45am !! No one was turned away and the sales started building.

People came looking for certain items and knew exactly what they wanted. We were fascinated by people and their choices. We even came across some people who were “resellers.” These folks were professionals. They pulled item after item because they were going to take them and repurpose them into something “new.” They were great negotiators and rarely wanted to pay full price. I thought they were really fun and saw items that people may consider as junk as something that had potential.

There were a few items that we hoped wouldn’t sell because deep down we wanted to keep them. We ended up with a set of antique 1/2 gallon milk bottles with a carrier that used to bring milk to people’s homes and a set of steel chairs from a patio set. We took the chairs and went to work on them by scraping loose paint, washing them down and giving them a new color so that they each had a new look !! We knew that these would be a unique addition to my daughter’s 1st college apartment.

They turned out great !! It only took an hour and a few dollars to breathe life into something that had been buried in a garage gathering rust and dust. It was also very fulfilling to know that this simple investment of time and work would help out someone else who could use them for years to come.

While I was giving the chairs a facelift, I thought of HR. I know that may seem like a stretch, but hear me out.

How many things are there that we do that sit and gather dust after we create them? We’re so excited when they were introduced, but we missed it when they were no longer relevant. The difference is that if we had a sale of old HR stuff, people wouldn’t be lined up to check it out.

What do you have that needs to be cleaned and given a new coat of paint? What do you have that needs to be put out for the sale just to flat get rid of it?

This week do some cleaning. Don’t settle for how you’ve been doing HR. Dig deep and take the items that need new life and give it them. At the same time, take the systems, policies and procedures that have no purpose anymore and get rid of them. Have the HR garage sale that you’ve needed to have !! You’ll be glad you did !!

Calling All Disruptors !!

In December 2013, a ripple in the HR continuum occurred when Disrupt HR was launched in Cincinnati, Ohio. It was a phenomenal event where 12 speakers took the stage at the Rhinegeist Brewery for their fast paced 5 minute talks using 20 slides each !! I’ve been fortunate to be involved with this movement since the beginning along with Jennifer McClure from Unbridled Talent and Chris Ostich from BlackbookHR. Our first time around was a wild success and we’ve seen other great events pop up around the country in Denver (twice) and Cleveland !!

The talks are invigorating, unconventional, high energy and provocative. To get a feel for what has happened so far, check these sample talks out !!

We’re about to launch our 2nd Disrupt HR in Cincinnati on Wednesday, September 10th – and this is where we need you !!

You can get involved in two ways. The first is the easiest and something that I’d encourage ALL HR folks within the Greater Cincinnati/Dayton/Northern Kentucky area to consider and that is to attend the event. We are going to have this episode of Disrupt HR at the incomparable Memorial Hall !! The tickets are free and you can get yours here. It’s a great way to network and be a part of the greater HR community. I truly hope to see you there.

The second way to get involved is to be a Disruptor and give a presentation. I know this may seem daunting to most people, but I also know that there are many HR folks who have great opinions and thoughts that others can learn from.

I loved presenting the first time and look forward to being involved again. I’d love to see you step out and make your voice heard. We need a few more people to speak at our event – so take the leap and sign up on our site for the Cincinnati event here. (Click on the button on the bottom right hand side of the page where it asks you to “Sign Up to Disrupt.” You’ll be glad you took the stage !!

HR can’t change unless we step up and make our voices heard. I know that you’d welcome the chance for HR to be better and now you have a forum to do that. So, here’s my best Paul Revere call to arms. The future is coming and you can be part of the movement that will shape it !! Be a Disruptor !!

It’s How You Look At It !!

This past week we lost a comic genius in Robin Williams. It’s sad that he passed because he always seemed to bring joy through his work. I’m one of those who “grew up” with Williams from his stand-up comedy, through Mork & Mindy and all of his movies.

I enjoyed his comedy because he looked at things from a slightly different perspective. His views were frenetic and never predictable !! I think that’s one reason that people loved watching him because you never knew what what coming. I think most would agree that they loved watching Williams and his madness, but they would not be comfortable practicing it themselves.

Having a different perspective on things is never popular. The pressure to stay within the norms of interactions, conversations and actions is huge. If you are an outlier, then people tend to look at you as a disruptive force instead of something inviting.

HR needs to learn from Robin Williams in a couple of ways. The first is that we should be the group that brings the different perspective to situations. We have the opportunity to represent both the employee and the leadership in organizations. Too often we are seen as representing management only. We need to be the voice of both sides and that takes some moxie to stand up and not be aligned to the Company only.

Secondly, we can breathe life into our role and our organizations like Williams did for us. Today, people don’t enjoy coming to work. It’s well documented and publicized to the point that you wonder if anyone enjoys work anymore. We can be the overwhelmingly positive model through HR. Each company has it’s struggles and obstacles, but it’s how you approach things.

One of my favorite Williams’ movies was Good Morning, Vietnam. In it, his character takes the horror of the situation people were involved in and looks at it differently. The humor he brought gave the troops a little light despite the situation they were in. I know what we do on a daily basis doesn’t compare to that type of extreme environment, but bringing a positive viewpoint to what we do is sorely needed !!

This week take the step to start having a different perspective in what you do, how you do it and allow others to bring in different viewpoints as well. Also, make sure you’re taking time to laugh and bring a positive perspective to HR and the employees you get to serve.

Ride the Waves !!

This past week was truly wonderful !! I was on a beach with my family enjoying vacation. Overall, the week was fairly uneventful and relaxing. We did the things we enjoy like playing Euchre, tackling an impossible 1,000 piece puzzle, rounds and rounds of miniature golf and time with our feet in the sand.

I don’t do well just sitting on the beach. I need to move and be a part of the flow of the environment around me. I love watching all of the different people walking by and sincerely wanting to talk to each of them (if it wouldn’t creep them out) and learn about who they are and what they do. I don’t do that . . . much, but the throngs of people fascinate me. I tend to roam up and down the beach to search for shells, look for unique things and take in as much of the experience as I can.

This year we were actually in a condo on the beach. And I mean ON the beach. The endless pulse of the Atlantic Ocean was a constant melody if we were splashing around in the waves, or listening to them as we fell asleep at night. It was a hypnotic symphony that I loved hearing and watching.

My kids and I love bouncing up and down in the waves for hours and hours. We happened to be out in the surf in some rather active waves. In fact, you had to really try to maintain your footing. After fighting this force of nature, you were worn out. We’d catch a breath, grab a drink of water and head right back out into waves.

It reminded me of HR, work and life. It may seem like a stretch, but hear me out. Life comes at all of us in waves. And, like the ocean, the waves never stop. I love it when we expect our employees not to “bring their life” issues to work because that is a flat joke. You can’t wish that people would do this because it’s not possible. Instead, I think we need to have a characteristic that should be in every HR role – resilience. It’s something that we don’t teach, and it’s even hard to think about it. This attribute is needed because waves of different sizes and intensity come at all of our employees every day. Instead of being pulled out by a rip tide, or having the waves of life bury us, we need to be there to pull people up and get them on their feet once again.

Too often we bemoan the circumstances of life that people share with us. We want everything to be just perfect and smooth and get frustrated when it’s not. Being resilient is what is needed instead. If we are the people who can be the example to others, then they will understand they have support. Support is something lacking in most workplaces for our employees. If HR could step in consistently, then people would appreciate this and not be overwhelmed by what comes at them.

Tomorrow, I jump back into the surf, but this time it’s at the office. I can’t wait to be in the waves with all of those around me !!

A Little Piece of My Heart !!

This week has been one of transition. My mother-in-law passed away at the age of 77 after a battle with Parkinson’s disease and dementia. Also, a dear friend of mine, who I sang alongside in our church choir, passed away gracefully at the age of 89. I doubt that few who read this blog know these two great people who impacted my life in tangible, meaningful ways. I am thankful that I can celebrate their lives and what they meant to me.

These two people also had an impact on my amazing wife, Debbie. I don’t mention her much on social forums because she’d prefer to be in the background. You see, she is a perfect reflection of the quote from Jerry Maguire – she completes me. She and I are almost complete polar opposites and everything I do poorly, she does well. I don’t know how my life would look without her. I don’t think it would be nearly as positive and great as it is because she so gracefully and effortlessly fills the voids and blind spots I have.

The majority of the people who touch our lives are more like my wife, my mother-in law and my friend from church. They are meaningful to us individually and the sphere of who they’re connected to varies greatly. Even though I may be personally connected to them, I may not be connected to the other amazing people who they know and interact with.

I want to take the time this week to share something that you may not know. Just like these three wonderful people – you have a piece of my heart !!

Too often, we downplay the impact EVERY single person in our lives has. We keep thinking that people only make an impact if they have visibility, notoriety or celebrity. Sadly, many people keep chasing those shallow attributes of our society thinking it will give more substance and meaning to their lives.

You need to know that YOU matter – at least to me. I don’t take any interaction I have with any person lightly. It may be the one and only time we ever cross paths. That matters. I may not personally see how this affects either your life or mine. But, I know that because you came across my path and in my life – you impacted me and made a difference.

I don’t view life in the manner that most people do. To me, the “humans” are key because my life is not defined by my profession. It’s just what I happen to do.

The losses I experienced this week reminded me that I don’t take enough time to let people who are in my life know how much I value them. I guess I assume they know, but that is a missed opportunity. This is something so critical to all of us as people to communicate how people touch our lives.

Make sure to notice everyone you come across this week !! Don’t ignore, brush off or move past some ONE to some THING you think is more important.

I don’t take our connection lightly. The fact that you would take the time to read this blog as well as connect in person and/or socially drives me and fuels my passion for people more than you know !!

I’m glad you are a piece of my heart !! I know that I am better because of it !!

Image Courtesy of Deviantart.com

All MAC’d Up !!

Sitting in an airport terminal gives you a chance to jot down your thoughts if you build in a bit of time. I’m trying to contain my excitement as I get ready to board my flight to SHRM14 in Orlando !! The actual conference doesn’t kick-off until Sunday, but I’m fortunate to head down early as a SHRM volunteer and member of the Membership Advisory Council (MAC).

The MAC is made up of five volunteer leaders who work with five regions of ten states each throughout the US. I am the 2014 Rep for the North Central Region which is basically the upper midwest section of the country. The MAC meets with SHRM State Directors and volunteers throughout the country and listens to their feedback, concerns and suggestions. We get to take their great input directly to the SHRM Board of Directors as well as other SHRM staff. It’s an incredible opportunity that had a very intentional beginning . . .

You see, I have been a SHRM member for many years now. However, when I began getting involved as a volunteer I was someone who commented on the sidelines about all the things that were “wrong” with the association and my local chapter. I was facilitating a monthly HR Roundtable in the late 90’s and was being more and more vocal about my disdain. Now, you have to know, that I had yet to go to a chapter meeting or SHRM event in person. It was just easier to join the negative throng because people seem to get jazzed about it.

One month after a Roundtable, a very engaged member of the Greater Cincinnati HR Association (GCHRA) confronted me. In fact, she pinned me against the wall !! Now, I’m a fairly tall person and this person was not. It didn’t deter her in the least. She said, “Hey Steve, I’m tired of you taking shots at what we do. You aren’t even involved yourself. In my opinion, you need to either get involved or shut up !!”

I was flabbergasted. This is not stereotypical behavior for an HR person. I admired her fervor though and took her up on her challenge. I decided to run for Vice-President of the chapter even though I’d never been to a meeting. I won. From that time I’ve been fortunate to be the Chapter President, State Conference Director for Ohio and State Council Director. I also still run the HR Roundtable each month and am entering my 15th year of being the facilitator.

I wanted to share this because I keep seeing other HR pros who sit on the sidelines and aren’t connected in their field. You may pay your membership dues, but that only gives you access to a website and a myriad of white papers. The National Conference is now upon us and you have a chance to act. So, consider this me pinning you to the wall.

When you go to SHRM14 – get fully immersed in everything that the conference has to offer. Be intentional in choosing your sessions and get great information that will help you be better in your role within your organization. Go into it seeking the nugget that will transform your approach to HR. Don’t just attend. Be active !!

Hit the Exhibit Hall, the SHRM Bookstore, the various events happening every night and take in all that you can !! Most importantly connected with the other HR pros who will be at the event. You can develop meaningful, professional relationships that could last your entire career. You will be surrounded by people. Be different and engage others instead of rushing from one event to the next.

When that volunteer pinned me to the wall years ago, she lit a fire in me that only continues to grow !! I know that SHRM has its faults and can do things better, just as most organizations do. However, I can only make a difference by being involved. I hope this gives you the spark you need to get involved in HR where you are !! If you get connected to other folks, join a chapter, start an HR blog, etc. you’re taking that next step.

I honestly can’t wait to see each and every person who is going to SHRM14 !! I’ll be the one on fire who will be geeked to meet you !! See you there !!

Listen.

Human Resources is often written about in vast layers and fantastic catch phrases !! When I see posts about “harnessing the synergy of human capital” I start to twitch. One of the shortcomings of what we do is that we try to make it harder than it needs to be. I think that HR has fallen into the trap that if we sound like we’re more intricate, then people will give us more credibility.

Weaving a broader web of terms and efforts that keep the “mystique” of HR as our brand lends itself to more confusion than clarification. When I talk to many of my peers, they share that many companies just “don’t get” them. This has to be frustrating for those practicing HR and those who work with them.

I’d like to show you a simple alternative. Listen.

It’s an overlooked skill and attribute that we don’t practice in HR, or in organizations for the most part. Please understand that I’m not talking about the different “types” of listening highlighted in communication models. It’s much more simple than that.

Our employees want people who will take the time to hear what is on their mind. We tend to think that these requests are such a hassle because we have so much more that is important and needs our attention. I have to work myself to not fall into this approach. I think that we consider the request to listen to people difficult because our mind tends to think the worst will occur. If we were honest about it, we tend to be more negative about people than positive. Our minds start to formulate all the “what if” scenarios that are sure to come up when the conversations occur, and they never come true.

Just this past week I had several requests from both Managers and front-line staff to meet with them. This wasn’t on my schedule or in my planner. The fact was that I had some fairly large projects in front of me that were due. I chose to fight the urge to put these requests to the side and went to meet with each person. I’m glad I did. In each situation, I was able to be the sounding board that was needed at that time. The conversations ranged from personal issues outside of work to difficultly with a manager who seems to be ignoring his staff.

Honestly, it was the best use of my time because the challenges that these employees were facing were only going to grow if someone didn’t listen to them. I think there are three keys to making listening work:

Be Available – That sounds simple, but as I mentioned before, we put other things in front of people all the time. Being available takes discipline and a ton of effort. If you do this, you’ll honestly differentiate yourself from most HR practitioners !!

Don’t Seek Solutions – This goes against the grain of who we are. We don’t feel we’re being good professionals if we don’t come up with the perfect solution to everything we face. You may get a chance to offer a solution, but just listen first. Seriously, listen and see where things go before formulating what could be done.

Be Consistent – You’ll do better to listen to all of your employees and not just those who are problems. The more you listen to people the more you learn. This will allow you to be closer to your team members, and chances are you’ll hear things early on and be able to anticipate how things will move.

Listening is something that has taken me years to learn. It’s tough to admit that but it’s true. I know it makes a difference. This week start listening and see what happens !!

All I Want Is You !!

Desire.

It’s an innate human element. Every person has desires about something. You can determine what those desires are typically by where a person spends their time and money. People can say they desire a variety of things or be more focused. Desires are unique. Even if people are wildly passionate about the same types of things, it’s never really the same.

Desire.

It’s something we want employees to have every day when they come to work. There are countless articles, blogs and efforts about employee engagement. When I see these I think more and more of the effort is on getting “buy-in” as to what a Company offers instead of allowing people to bring their desires to the workplace. We aren’t very comfortable with really allowing people to be who they are.

HR spends an incredible amount of its time and focus on limiting behavior and adding stipulations to systems to make sure people comply and fit in. In fact, most managers talk with the majority of their employees only when needed. That includes sitting down for performance reviews, weekly meetings, etc. More and more of our structures force interactions, but they don’t develop communication or bring out the best in our people.

What if we changed ?? What if HR took the opportunity to be less restrictive and chose to work on ways to bring out the best in people? It’s not the norm in our field by a long shot. It calls for more variety and people assume that more variety will bring instability and chaos. I think that’s not true. There is more variability, but that should allow for genuine diversity and not some trumped up program that makes us “feel better.”

Desire.

Think about it. A workplace that is filled with people who can discuss and share their lives. I don’t think this should be a forced effort in the least. However, HR struggles with this too. I’m not sure why we all have relationships, friendships and interactions rather naturally as a social norm, but we don’t try to foster that in the workplace. I think that if we took the time to not just “talk” with people, but just treat them like the desirous, passionate humans they are, we’d enjoy each other so much more !!

I want to encourage you to take a “U2” approach to this. You have to know that I’m a fierce U2 fan and love all of their work. You could say that following them is one of my desires. One of their fab songs is “All I Want is You.” The song lists many things that someone wants, but the signer responds that all they want is that person. It really is a consuming approach to have the feeling that someone wants you that completely.

I know this is a big step. I also know that it works !! I try to take more and more of my time with my co-workers and find out what drives them. I may not share their same interests, but knowing what they are passionate about is fabulous. It allows me to have more of a connection with them as well as something to check in on when we see each other. It’s very enriching and it makes HR wonderful.

You see in the end – I hope our desire is people.

I Love to Laugh !!

How often are you around little kids? I would have to say that I’m not around them nearly often enough !! Little kids “get it” when it comes to life. They see everything around them as something worth looking at, taking time for, and experiencing. They will do this for their entire day and think that it’s normal. When adults step in to squelch their innate sense of joy and exploration, kids respond with some of the most confused facial expressions possible.

One characteristic that I truly enjoy is hearing children laugh. It’s infectious. They see things that most of us consider mundane or irrelevant, and just flat lose their mind. It’s fantastic !! When a child loses themselves completely in laughter, anyone who is near them will be affected . . . in a good way. They usually bust out in raucous laughter themselves.

I have to confess. I’m a laugher. It’s a loud, belly laugh more often than not. I make sure to laugh every day. Every day. It’s not like I put in a planner or on my To-Do lists. There are just too many things that happen every day that deserve laughter and joy. You never know what it will be, but you will miss it if you’re not looking for it.

I wish more HR people would bring laughter and joy to what they do !! When I get together with my peers, and we can peel back the frustrations of the job, we have more laughs than not. The question is – how can you incorporate more laughter in your workplace? The first thing to do is to take on the philosophy that Charlie Chaplin followed (see the picture).

If you thought that your entire day would be wasted if you didn’t laugh, I bet you’d laugh more often !! There are countless studies that show the healing power of laughter and how it reduces stress. If that’s not enough of an incentive, it also clears the cobwebs and allows you to look at something with a fresh perspective. Any feelings of angst just disappear.

Secondly, you have to take on the Mary Poppins approach where Ed Wynn proudly sings, “I love to laugh, loud and long and clear !!” Laughing out loud is essential. We are way too reserved as HR pros in the workplace. We keep to ourselves and don’t feel that we can express ourselves. That’s truly a shame because we have an opportunity to bring life and excitement to our people, our workplace and our culture. If you chose to look at HR with this perspective, would it change your outlook as to what you do?

This week, stop the grousing and start the chuckling !! Something so simple can be something extremely profound. Look for the laughter. I know I will !!