‘Life’ Articles at Everyday People, Page 5

Geeked !!

If you know me at all, you’ve heard the word “geeked” !! My wife would even say that I use the word a little too much. I can’t help in though.

Recently, I was fortunate enough to be the opening keynote at the SCIHRA Conference. We had a great time, and a true highlight for me was when an attendee came up to me after the presentation and said, “Wow, it was great to hear HR in a positive and fun way !!” I thanked her, but then thought that it was telling if someone had to come to an event to get HR pros geeked about what we do.

I couldn’t let this pass so I asked her how she saw HR. (Get ready . . .)

“Well, most everyone we read or hear from is either negative, snarky or sarcastic. It’s hard to be motivated when so few are encouraging. You took the things we do everyday and brought passion and humor. It was great to laugh !! ” Ouch !!! I thanked her again and it made me think.

You see, being geeked to me isn’t just being “positive.” It’s really a choice of how to approach life – not just HR.

Trust me, I know what it’s like to be in a blue funk, have a frustrating day, or be negative. To take a different approach to life takes a ton of effort and a commitment to being intentional.

Being geeked isn’t always taken very well by others either. Unfortunately, most people start every day with a heavy sigh and a negative thought about what’s not done. Then, it usually gets darker from there.

I’m sure there will be folks who read this and think that being geeked is some “act” or just being naive and a utopian. Someone who’s dodging reality. Not true in the least.

People relish the chance to have someone with them who’s excited about who they are, what they do and what’s happening in their lives. It’s an incredible feeling to see folks come to life when you get them all geeked up !!

You see, there are tons of blogs, books and articles on people bringing their “whole self” to work. I get that, but few practice it. If you try this approach, you might get to see your whole self emerge. That would be awesome !!

So, this week pick something and go for it. Get geeked and tell others about it. Post it on Twitter or Facebook. Send it in an e-mail. Take a picture. Whatever works for you, do it. Trust me, you’ll love your day just a bit more when you do !!

I’ll be looking for the great things you’re doing. Need to go now and see the next new thing. You know I’ll probably be . . .

Grace

When someone wrongs you, how do you react? Are you angry, vindictive, ready to pounce? For most of us, the answer is “it depends.” We’ll take a breath and then decide the best course of action.

However, when it comes to employees, we often forget to breathe first. We jump to the nearest set of policies and then comb through them to see what level of discipline needs to be metered out. It amazes me as an HR person that when employees slip up, the reaction is usually swift, harsh and doesn’t take anything into consideration – really.

Our systems of progressive discipline and layers of breaking Rule 1.0.1, Subsection A litter our field with little regard of how these actions affect the person who broke said rule. We act as if they are the most disloyal, uncaring and detrimental person who EVER worked for the company !!

Here’s a question for you . . . ever make a mistake or break a rule at work?

Did the appropriate action take place? Were you written up, counseled, suspended or fired? What if you were in this situation? How should the Company treat you ??

It’s time for a different approach to HR. Please take note that this path is much more difficult, painful and intentional. However, it works !!

Grace.

Before launching into the employee handbook, remember that your decision and actions are actually affecting another person’s life. That may be their life at work, or their life in general. I don’t think that as HR professionals, we ever think about the person we’re addressing. Our system is more important because we feel we are acting justly and, in doing so, we’re protecting the Company.

I’m not saying that discipline and termination aren’t warranted at work. However, I use a yard stick which says that these only occur based on an employee’s behavior and actions. Even with that benchmark, I still review each case and take into account all of the factors as well as the person who’s about to be disciplined. I want them to come out of any conversation understanding the situation, its context and how we move forward from there.

Now, so you don’t think I’m being Utopian or an idealist, understand that I practice this personally inside work and outside of work. It’s not a popular position because most people want a pound of flesh when they are wronged. I’ll hold out until the last moment that I can before making difficult decisions because I believe in people, even in the darkest situations.

You see, I make mistakes and I have disappointed others – even those closest to me. How can I expect grace from others if I am not willing to be graceful myself? Also, how will others show grace if it isn’t given to them?

I know this works. And, I have reassurance as well because I’ve seen the results. It’s like U2 says in their phenomenal song – Grace from All That You Can’t Leave Behind – “Grace finds goodness in everything.” Try it and see !!

Believe in others !!

One summer while I was in high school, I worked as a counselor at an Easter Seals camp for disabled adults. Going to this camp genuinely changed my perspective on life !! I entered the camp a bit freaked out honestly. Everyone around me was vastly different that me, and what I was “used to.” People in wheelchairs. People who couldn’t speak clearly. People who couldn’t feed themselves, or pretty much care for themselves on their own.

Remember, I was a teenager. Arrogant, self-assured, indestructible, etc. This was too much for me. The adult who had asked me to work was a counselor I had a Church Camp for years. He was a mentor and knew me better than I knew myself. The first night at camp, I cried myself to sleep because of the challenged people and my inability to accept them.

The first full day of camp, Duane (my mentor), asked me to sit in a wheelchair and he tied my left hand (I’m left handed) to the arm of the chair. He then told me that I was teaching art class all day for campers, but wouldn’t be allowed to leave my chair. I had to eat all of my meals, use the restroom and live the life of the campers. I didn’t handle it well !! I was frustrated at how limited I found myself. Duane had told the campers to really push me – and they did with fervor !!

As the day came to a close, one of the campers, Bill, who had severe cerebral palsy and “spoke” with a rudimentary computer, pulled me aside. He said something that changed me forever. He said, “Steve, don’t be frustrated. We ALL have disabilities !! Some are just more visible than others.”

34 years later, Bill’s words rang true once again . . .

This past week I was honored enough to be a part of Disability Awareness Day at the Statehouse in Columbus, Ohio. One of our LaRosa’s Team Members, Mark, was going to speak about being able to work and be independent. Mark was born without arms and he is one of our Customer Service Representatives and has been with us for 7+ years. As he came to the podium and microphone, he boldly spoke of his work and how he loves taking people’s orders so they can enjoy our great food. He doesn’t view himself as being different. He knows he is a person who is able !!

The room was at capacity and was filled with people whose disabilities were “more visible than others.” They cheered for Mark when he finished and a person in a wheelchair gave me a high five as I came off the stage as well. The great people on this day reminded me that we need to believe in ALL people !! Everyone at the rally felt you were included and not separate. We all came together – as it should be.

So, this week make sure to change your perspective on people from now on. Everyone has value and a life worth living to its fullest extent. Don’t pass someone over, or avoid them because of their appearance. Instead, reach out and let them know that you believe in them. It will change your life as it has mine.

Leave a Mark !!

A huge event just happened, but you probably didn’t notice it. No, it wasn’t the Grammys. It was something much more relevant !! What was it?

My dad turned 70 years old !!

So what? People hit milestone birthdays every day. What’s so big about this one? Let me share a story . . .

You see, my “Dad” is technically my stepdad. My biological father passed away when I was four years old, and my mom raised my brother and I on her own for nine years until she met Don. Again, not a significant tale . . . yet.

The night Don proposed to my mom, he came into the bedroom that my brother and I shared. He quietly said, “Boys, your Mom and I are going to get married and I wanted to ask you something. Do you want to call me ‘Dad’ or ‘Don’?”

Now, I was the man of the house as the eldest son, and I was also an ignorant teenager who defiantly replied, “You’ll NEVER be our Dad !! He’s dead and you can’t replace him.” Don looked back at us and said, “That’s fine. I just wanted to ask,” and he humbly left our room. I thought I had put him in his place and didn’t think that I was being awful at all.

That was 1976. He still married my mom and for years I held true and called him Don. He was still the model father and husband regardless of my not claiming that he was. Then high school graduation hit. I was valedictorian of my small school and gave a speech. This was very important to my dad because he loves a great public speaker. I was nervous, but it went well. As I walked out of the gym after the ceremony, he hugged me (for the first time) and said, “I love you Steve.” I broke down and said, “Thanks, Dad !!”

He’s truly been my Dad from the day he came into my life. You may still be asking why this should matter to you as a reader. Here’s why . . .

My Dad has stuck with me ever since he came into my life. He knew that it was his role to leave a mark on my life. He modeled everything I have hoped to be as a father, husband, citizen, man of faith, humorist, speaker, etc. He never walked away even though I wasn’t accepting of him at first.

In HR, we meet people every day and in various situations. Do you look at those interactions as a place to leave your mark, or are you too rushed and busy to see that you could make a difference? Are “things” more important than the time you spend with people?

My Dad showed me the example of who I am, and who I plan to be for the rest of my life. Every person I encounter has purpose and meaning. I have a chance to leave a mark ever day, every moment, everywhere.

So do you. The question is . . . will you?

Being there !!

One of the coolest outcomes of being involved in social media is meeting the folks behind their avatars. The vast majority of folks I’ve met rock and the “connection” we had on-line has turned into friendships that have relevance and meaning.

Today we are celebrating one of my dearest friendships that came from the various forums, and that is with Paul Hebert. Last year a tradition of #TimSackettDay was started for the inimitable Tim Sackett. To have it be #PaulHebertDay this year is just as cool !!

Paul reached out one day when I mentioned that the HR Roundtable that I facilitate in Cincinnati was going to be on Incentives and Recognition. For those of you who don’t yet know Paul – he is THE go to resource in this area in the country !! (Not an embellishment. It’s a fact !!) He wanted to Skype in or call in to be part of the discussion. I said that I hadn’t had that type of request before because it’s better as a live forum. He asked when it was happening. I told him and he said, ” I’ll be there !! ”

Now, the commute from Greenville, South Carolina to Cincinnati, Ohio takes a bit of time – say 6 1/2 hours or so. He gets the prize for longest distance traveled to be at a Roundtable to date !! When he popped out of the car, I ran to hug him because that’s what I do when I see a friend. He was a bit taken aback for a sec, but he knew it was what brothers do.

First time we met in person. First, now of many !! We saw each other at HRevolution in Atlanta, SHRM National 2012, Ohio SHRM (where he rocked it as a speaker) and most recently at GCHRA in Cincinnati. We always make time to catch up, share ideas and most importantly challenge each other !!

You see, I dig Paul because he’s very intentional about life – as am I. I think that’s one of the key elements that ties us together. Most people shy away from folks who are fully intentional, but not Paul. He is always willing to mold thoughts, give various perspectives and hone our conversations. I don’t get mad about this. I CHERISH IT !!

He’s facing a serious health issue right now, and true to nature, he put up a blog to share about his experience and I love it. In spite of the blog, I call him because talking to him is more intentional and that is what we’ve come to expect from each other.

He’s pulling through this challenge and then he’s launching into his new business relationship with Symbolist. I’m geeked for him and for the great work that is going to come from this partnership !!

When Paul wrote about coming to Cincy for the HR Roundtable, he used the Proclaimers fab one-hit wonder – I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles). In the lyrics they state how the person would be there for his friend no matter what. That’s what #PaulHebertDay is to me.

I will be there for him no matter what !!

Make sure you get to know Paul. You’re life will be more intentional and only brighter because of it !!

Let’s Build a Barn !!

You may or may not know this, but I grew up on a farm. My grandparents raised my brother and I in beautiful Luckey, Ohio (population now of 1,019 !!). It was about half that when I was growing up. My mom worked full time after the passing of my father. We didn’t think anything was “different” with this situation. We LOVED the farm !!

I still love visiting the farms of my relatives. The smells, sounds and general feel of rural life still has a strong allure !! One of my favorite places on a farm is the barn. Barns are incredible places with their nooks, hidden passages, farm equipment, animals, and the obligatory farm cats that just “appear” out of nowhere it seems.

Barns are treasured by farmers. They are incredible structures that seem to weather the test of time. It takes an amazing amount of effort and time to keep a barn in working condition though. They are usually massive buildings, and just to keep them painted is a monumental effort of time and money.

Because of that, barns too often fall into disrepair as the farm (and farmer) age. You’ve seen the barns that make up the landscape as you drive through the country. It’s sad to see this because, at one time, something amazing happened in this essential component of the farm’s daily activities !!

When I see these falling architectural giants, I think of the things that once had meaning and value at work, especially in HR !! You can think of those systems, approaches, policies and procedures that you never change. Chances are they make up the vast majority of your handbooks !! Our company’s landscape is littered with collapsing barns and we just won’t let them go. We think that if we still hold onto them, the glorious past of what once was will magically resurrect itself.

We need to change our approach. Time to build new barns. Not ones that will last forever, but ones that will move our profession and our companies forward. The great thing about barn building on a farm is that it brings everyone together as well !! Make sure you see that the community you serve is involved. Let them bring their own building materials so that this new structure serves everyone !!

So, this week, pull out that handbook and review the collapsing barn you have. See what hasn’t been used, or is even relevant anymore. Tear it down. People will appreciate it. In its place build something new, exciting and effective !! You will be better for it !!

HR is Puzzling !!

I love puzzles !! I mean it. I love the challenge of opening a box and seeing thousands of tiny, misshapen pieces that only show a portion of a bigger picture. To be honest, I like puzzles that are also a little unique. I’m not a big fan of the large, scenic panoramas. If it’s something that challenges you and comes out with a very cool end product – then I’m in.

At Christmas, the kids and I all got puzzles. Here’s a look at them . . .

Cool puzzle of the US made up of license plates !!

A double-sided puzzle of David Bowie’s classic album – The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars !! Dig that – puzzles and rock combined !!

Puzzles also offer great lessons for HR. Here are a few . . .

Give things framework !! – The first rule in most puzzles is to put together the frame because it defines the puzzles boundaries and also gives it just enough structure to give it cohesiveness. Great HR does the same when you look at employee situations as well as your systems and “frame” them up !!
Every piece counts !! – When you look on a puzzle box and see that there are 1,000 pieces, then you rely on the fact that without even one piece, the puzzle is incomplete. What if we looked at our teams and our employees in the same way? If we had the approach that every person mattered, wouldn’t you strive to make sure that happened?
We come in different shapes !! – It’s time that HR understood that diversity is all around us in our organizations. It’s not a program or an initiative. It’s a fact !! Just like puzzle pieces, people each add their own take, shape, approach and view on the work we do.
Look at the big picture !! – The thrill of completing a puzzle is that you get to see the results of your work and the whole picture comes into view. Too often, HR gets hung up on one piece and can’t let it go until that one is “fixed.” When you see how the whole puzzle of employees, integrating HR, being strategic and moving a company forward come together – you’ll try to help pieces fit vs. trying to fix them.

All of us in HR have puzzles we have to evaluate, consider, assemble and/or disassemble everyday. Instead of looking at that as a point of frustration, why not view it as a great thing to do? Seeing things come together will help you enjoy HR everytime the next puzzle comes along !!

Hot Chocolate Made With Milk !!

A few weekends ago an amazing person passed away !! She influenced more people than she ever knew and she never would have taken credit for any of it. Did you see her passing in the press/social media? No, I’m sure you didn’t.

You see, it was my Aunt Elaine.

After 81 phenomenal years, Aunt Elaine moved onto the next stage of life where I’m sure she was welcomed with open arms !! I was at the SHRM Leadership Conference when her funeral services were held and I was disappointed to not be there for my extended family and the myriad of people who came to show their respects and shine as an example of who she touched.

You see, my brother and I were incredibly blessed when we were very young. Our Dad, a Vietnam Vet, passed away in 1968 after losing a battle with Hodgkin’s Disease cancer. We were 4 and 2 at the time. Living in the mighty metropolis of Luckey, Ohio (yes, it is a town) would have been difficult for my Mom to raise two young boys except for our incredibly tight knit family. Most days we were with my Grandma and Grandpa as Mom went to work. However, we were often at Aunt Elaine’s , a mere mile and a half away as well.

I fondly remember spending the night and waking up before dawn with my cousins to go out and work in the barn doing chores to care for the farm animals. It was hard work for a young boy, but every aspect of it was spectacular !! The warmth, the smell, the sounds – all of it permeated every inch of you and made you feel connected to the life of being a farmer.

After chores, we would all bounce back into my Aunt and Uncle’s simple farm home to a table overflowing with food !! Farm fresh eggs which we had just gathered, bacon from the farm, toast from homemade bread and of course – hot chocolate made with milk !! The chance to have breakfast, or any meal, at my Aunt’s house was an incredible treat. We thought this was “normal” for when we were at the farm and revelled in it !!

Why does this all matter ??

You see, we all leave a legacy in our lives whether we choose to or not. My Aunt Elaine touched countless numbers of people with her laughter, her charity, her positive glow and outlook on life and her love for family.

In HR we work around people every day and we have the chance to be a positive imprint on their lives. We often think that by focusing on the “business” of what we do is more important than caring for others as people. Just remember – that leaves an imprint as well !!

So, this week, what can you do to be that simple mug of hot chocolate? Be intentional and value all of those whose lives you touch !! It will matter eternally !!

Talent Takes Time !!

This weekend I had an incredible time with my son and 5,000 other Boy Scouts at Peterloon. This isn’t a post about scouting, it’s about talent.

You see, this weekend my son was the “Senior Patrol Leader” meaning that he was in charge of the entire weekend. He made sure everything was packed, ready to go, the camp was set up and the boys/adults had a productive time during the event. He had to organize activities, keep track of details, encourage great behavior and address behavior that was a little more “challenging.”

During the camp tear down, I was about to “direct” some scouts to take care of things, when my son stepped in and said, “Dad, that’s not what we’re going to do. That’s not a good use of our time. I want to see the boys move the dining flies, tear down the chairs and then put things in the trailer. Then we’ll eat. We need to get these things done so we can stay on track.”

Did I mention my son’s 15 ??

This is the same young man who has done all of the goofy things boys do. He’s incredibly funny, creative, witty and caring. I am sure he will be successful in whatever he chooses to pursue. His ideas are so far out of the box as to how to approach people that he finds people following his lead and innovation.

He’s a great example of why talent takes time. If you would have told me that my son would become the young man I saw taking charge this weekend when he was young, I would have laughed out loud !!

Too often in organizations, HR follows the bright shining star who bursts onto the scene. Everyone follows this person exclaiming their talent and the gold mine of leadership that he/she is sure to be for years to come !! At times, this plays out. However, too often the supernova is just that – a super nova. They dazzle, draw attention and may do something short-term that astonishes everyone around and has great initial success.

Talent happens over a slow burn. Talent is sustainable. Talent is consistent and remains constant . . . over time.

So, when you clamor for the next “Talent Management” seminar or best practice, step back and review the employees around you. Who is that person or department that consistently builds others up? What person(s) make others shine through bringing their whole team along? Are you trying to develop a series of supernovas, or true talent?

I can’t wait to see what happens in the future for my son. I know it’s impossible to predict. He’s surprised me so far. I’m sure the great people around you will surprise you as well . . . if you just look out for the talent all around you !!

One Small Step . . .

This weekend one of my heroes passed away – Neil Armstrong. Maybe because he was a farm boy from Northwest Ohio, or because he was proud to be “nerdy,” or because he was humble and genuine.

I vividly remember being in my Grandfather’s house in tiny Luckey, Ohio with my aunts, uncles and cousins crowded around the TV as Walter Cronkite reported the landing of Apollo 11 on the moon. When Armstrong actually came out onto the ladder and began moving toward the surface of the moon, there was awe and silence in the house. After he uttered his immortal words and stepped onto the moon, my Grandfather – the epitome of the hard working farmer – just kept saying, ” I’ll be damned. I’ll be damned.” The general disbelief of what we all just saw was burnt into our lives forever.

If you’ve ever seen interviews with Armstrong after this life- changing event, he remained unassuming, thoughtful and curious. He wanted to see people continue to stretch boundaries, just as he had. The Armstrongs live about 30 minutes from my current house just outside Cincinnati. So, this legend, was living a regular life and that is a great example !!

When he said “One small step,” he inspired a nation. It makes you think. What could I do if I took one small step? So often, in our lives, and especially at work, we think that change has to occur in giant chunks, or earth-shattering movements. In reality, it only takes those small, incremental steps.

What are some steps you could take in HR to be this type of “explorer”? Could you make sure to say “Hi” to ALL of your employees (and not just the ones you’re comfortable with)? Could you challenge something that needs to be corrected, but no one will step forward? Would you join a local HR chapter, go to a regional or State Conference to meet other HR folks?

The questions and efforts are all within our reach. This week, find your Neil Armstrong moment and take one small step forward in some area of your life. Who knows – it might end up being something that is a “giant leap for all mankind” !!

Image courtesy of NASA